Love Is Love

Shamika is your neighborhood friend who is always dreaming of getting married to every guy she is dating. This time she is Dating a man named David, you and David went to the same collage and you’ve always known him as a playboy, you are scared that he is going to break her heart if she takes him seriously. You tell her that he is going to break her heart, but she insists that she sees herself marrying him as she claims that God brought them together. After a year of you guys being out of contact with each other, you bump into her and she informs you that she got married to David and that they are expecting twins, you guys exchange numbers so that you would be in contact with each other. When you and your friend are out for dinner, you spot Shamika’s husband David, getting cozy with another lady. When you ask your friend if she knows them, she tells you that she knows his family and that Shamika herself knows that David is cheating on her, but continues to stay with him because she claims that God told her to forgive and stay with him no matter how many times he cheats on her.

Would you cause a scene by confronting David about his behavior?

Shamika needs counseling, for as long as she continues to forgive David he is never going to change his cheating habits. She has to take charge of her marriage and set some rules and boundaries. She may now be in a tough position as she is pregnant but she has to go for counseling and get herself checked before they involve the kids in their drama. She has to consider the fact that her marriage may affect her children as well. As her friend I would speak to her about her situation, if I’m unable to change her mind there’s nothing I could do about it. Once she realizes that her children would be involved in this, she may decide to leave him or do something that would make David change his behavior. She does not realize that she keeps encouraging his behavior by forgiving him every time he cheats. David should divorce her if he does not want to be with her, or he should stop cheating on her if he wants his family to be happy. Only Shamika has the power to change everything that is happening in her life. If she claims that God wants her marriage to work, she should also make an effort and convince her husband to go with her for marriage counseling.

Would you allow yourself to be in this kind of situation?